Series: Teach Me
Volume: 1/?Publisher: Self-Published
Genre/s: Gay Romance
Length: 27 000 words
Read in: English
Review copy format: epub
Rate:✮✮✮✮✰✰
After his father had left the family, Austin's mother tried to take care of him and his younger sister as best as she could, but life didn't make it easy for her. The siblings were often looked after by a teenage neighbor, who with time became interested in minor Austin and, as a consequence, sexually abused him. And although this nightmare eventually ended, bad touch hurts for life. The mentally tormented boy finally grew up and decided to join the Marine Corps. However, after a few years, it turns out that the dramatic events he survived during his mission in Afghanistan also affected his mental health. Coming back to his country, Austin needs to get a treatment and learn how to live like a normal person, which is a bigger challenge than he originally thought.
Daniel grew up in a poor but loving family. Smart and very intelligent, he quickly became independent and focused mainly on his education. During his studies, and also in his later life, he discovered how much he wanted to love and be loved. However, having no luck in love, he devoted himself to his work with people struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder. When Austin, young but deeply experienced by fate, becomes one of his patients, Daniel takes him under his wing and tries to help him get back on his feet. However, with time a deep feeling, which shouldn't be there, appears between them.
Daniel grew up in a poor but loving family. Smart and very intelligent, he quickly became independent and focused mainly on his education. During his studies, and also in his later life, he discovered how much he wanted to love and be loved. However, having no luck in love, he devoted himself to his work with people struggling with post-traumatic stress disorder. When Austin, young but deeply experienced by fate, becomes one of his patients, Daniel takes him under his wing and tries to help him get back on his feet. However, with time a deep feeling, which shouldn't be there, appears between them.
Undoubtedly, one of the biggest advantages of "Teach Me to Touch You" is the subject of child sexual abuse and peer violence touched in this novella. The author managed to show the child's innocence, their feelings, the ease with which they can be blackmailed, the shame they feel, as well as presented the possible subsequent consequences of these issues for their psyche. Just as important is the fact that in this context Joshua Landon also touched another extremely important topic, namely he explicitly stressed that while physical wounds are visible to the naked eye, they are often less severe than those that can't be seen, as they are inflicted on the psyche, and are much harder to heal. I admit that when this problem appeared in the story, I was deeply moved, because it is a truth about which we often forget and which we ignore while we should always keep this truth in mind. Because it is easy to harm another human being, but usually no one thinks about the consequences.
I admit that reading "Teach Me to Touch You" I was also moved by the fact that although Joshua Landon created a story to some extent dramatic and full of negative events, at the same time, he focused on presenting positive human qualities, such as gentleness, patience, willingness to help, dedication, unconditional love. Simultaneously, he shows the strength and beneficial effects of all these positive qualities and their healing properties. By building trust between the characters, letting them discover the best in each other, he brings them closer together and lets love be born. I think it is very important, because there are only a few novels in which feelings and relationship are being built in such a way – deep, emotional, patient. It really captivated me.
In this novella I also like the fact that the author presented an often incredibly rough and dramatic patch, through which the characters had to go starting from childhood, through adolescence to adulthood. Undoubtedly the purpose of such an action is to show us the most complete picture of the events that over the years shaped Austin and Daniel, the conditions in which they grew up, and the difficulties they struggled which to eventually became the people they are when they meet for the first time. What's more, the theme of their sexuality is inseparably connected with their journey through life. And here Joshua Landon really surprised me, because in his novella he boldly shows that our beliefs concerning our sexual orientation are not infallible, and our everyday life journey has a huge impact on our discovery of ourselves and our preferences, including the sexual ones. I admit that I didn't expect it, but I am very happy that the author raised this topic.
Unfortunately, reviewing "Teach Me to Touch You" I also need to write about one "but" that I couldn't ignore as I was reading this novella. Namely, a "time hole". Due to the form of this story, that presents the events that have been taking place in the characters' lives since the early years of their existence, we kind of expect that all the occurrences relevant to their life journey would be presented in great detail. And that's how it is at the beginning, but at some point a great "time jump" that really catches our eye occurs. We witness Austin's decision to join the Marines and in the next moment he comes back to his country broken, lost and in need of help. The events that took place in Afghanistan, which had such an impact on Austin that they are one of the reasons of his post-traumatic stress disorder, are not presented to us at that moment at all. Only later on, as this young man begins to fight PTSD, we have the opportunity to see some of these dramatic events. This makes us feel a bit unsatisfied, and the novella seems to be somewhat incomplete.
With all this in mind I state that "Teach Me to Touch You", the first novella in the "Teach Me" series, although not perfect, as apart from numerous advantages, we also find some disadvantages here, is undoubtedly a very valuable and moving book. On the one hand, it shows a difficult, painful and psychologically devastating journey through life, at the end of which a solace awaits, on the other hand it presents emotional ups and downs and a strong need to give love to the other person. I'm really curious what the author has prepared for his readers in the second part of this story.
Headcanon: Daniel often takes Austin on various trips and excursions to places close to nature and far from crowds.
Fanfiction idea: Daniel and Austin go fishing. Daniel loses his footing and falls into the lake, which fortunately is not too deep. Obviously, the man is not happy anyway, but Austin bursts out laughing having a great time.
AU idea: Daniel is a great scholar who starts working at the royal court, as prince's teacher. During his stay in the palace, he meets Austin, a withdrawn and constantly frightened slave who seems to be hiding a terrible secret. Daniel decides to discover what it may be and help Austin.
Here's some more about:
Book Title: Teach Me to Touch You (Novella 1 in the Teach Me Series)
Author: Joshua Landon
Heat Rating: 3 flames
Release Date: December 23, 2018
When Austin’s father deserts his young family, he leaves Austin and his sister to struggle with poverty and neglect at home and bullying at school. When Austin’s first girlfriend kisses him in high school, his PTSD flashback to childhood abuse scares his girlfriend away.
A Marine at eighteen, Austin returns home after four years with his PTSD aggravated by nightmares of war. He fears he’ll never have a sex life.
Daniel, a psychiatric technician with a speciality in PTSD, helps Austin readjust to civilian life. Over months of work together, trust grows between them along with an attraction they hide from each other, since Austin is straight and Daniel is gay.
A gifted healer, Daniel believes a sexual relationship between them could harm Austin, though Austin is anxious to learn to touch again. But when their visits are scheduled to end, both men must deeply examine their concerns and untangle their desires for the future.
A Marine at eighteen, Austin returns home after four years with his PTSD aggravated by nightmares of war. He fears he’ll never have a sex life.
Daniel, a psychiatric technician with a speciality in PTSD, helps Austin readjust to civilian life. Over months of work together, trust grows between them along with an attraction they hide from each other, since Austin is straight and Daniel is gay.
A gifted healer, Daniel believes a sexual relationship between them could harm Austin, though Austin is anxious to learn to touch again. But when their visits are scheduled to end, both men must deeply examine their concerns and untangle their desires for the future.
Excerpt
Austin
I was seven when my dad left for work in the morning and never came back. My sister Julie was six.
It was a bad year, the first truly awful year. Not that the years before had been ideal, with my parents snapping at each other over each little affront, but at least they’d both been part of my life. And with either parent alone, I’d felt like a normal kid. It wasn’t entirely self-deceptive—it was all I knew.
But the day my dad pushed my mom against the wall, cocking back one huge fist to strike her, I ran to push myself between them.
“No, Dad, don’t!” I’d cried.
He’d looked at me, lowered his fist, and never spoke another word to me.
In the morning, he was gone.
At first, the dad-sized hole inside me seemed about to swallow me up. I was sure I’d die like the baby bird I’d found in the yard early that spring. I’d given it water and worms in a shoebox with crumpled toilet paper for warmth, but it wouldn’t eat or drink and grew steadily weaker. When it quit moving altogether, my mother stroked my hair, soothing me in a whisper.
“Its tiny heart quit beating, Tintin. Baby birds are too small to survive without their parents. But you gave it the best care you could. Its death isn’t your fault.”
I buried the bird in the back corner of our Mountlake Terrace yard without fanfare, digging its grave in the frozen ground with icy fingers that held a bent teaspoon. Despite my mother’s insistence that I wasn’t to blame, I knew the truth. I’d failed the bird just as I had failed my father.
About the Author
A fanboy of books, theater, and cinema and a supporter of the LGBT+ community, Joshua Landon lives in the greenbelt and park-filled community of Lynnwood, Washington not far from Seattle, Edmonds and Everett—a great location to experience the outdoors, music and the arts. He recently authored the three Teach Menovellas, a romance about two young men: a troubled Marine and a talented healer. They will become available for order through Amazon online in multiple countries, releasing between December 23, 2018 and February 2019.
When not writing, Landon enjoys building stage sets, bungee jumping, river rafting, and watching films from all eras. He shares his bookshelf-lined home with a middle-aged tomcat, and his back yard fills seasonally with wild rabbits.
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